In the world today, where the popular notion is that many men are afraid to commit, either in the form of signing the dotted lines, or even staying faithful in a relationship, a woman can help to tip the scales in the relationship’s favour. World-famous dating expert, Christian Carter, shares some tips on things a woman can do to ensure that a man falls in love with her, and only her.
Many men shy away from relationships for various reasons. Some claim they’re willing to wait for the perfect time, some think it’s too much work to keep one, others, who view fidelity with a strict eye,
would rather not commit till they’re absolutely ready.
However, even the sworn bachelor will be willing to take the risk if he meets the woman who makes it
all worth it. Below are a few qualities men look out for to convince them to abandon their bachelorhood
confines:
Relax on the ‘husband-material’ rules
A major constraint that makes many men unwilling to shed their single status is the fear that every available lady is searching desperately for a husband.
As Carter puts it, “We, just like you, yearn for a partner who wants us for who we are, not just for what we can give. And so the minute a man gets even a hint that you have an agenda beyond just getting to know him, he immediately shuts down and starts to feel less attracted to you.
“It’s really tempting to think that your time is precious and that you need to find out right away whether or not a man is up for a lifelong commitment. But making this the focus of your
early interactions with a man is dangerous. Take your time getting to know him and letting him see
that you enjoy being with him – not that he’s just a means to an end.”
Be independent and selective
According to Madame Marie du Deffand, “Women are never stronger than when they arm themselves
with their weaknesses.” Women must be willing to exude independence, especially in a relationship.
“When a man thinks you’ve centered your whole life around him and that you’ve already decided he’s
the one before you have spoken about commitment, he’ll feel pressured. He’ll feel pressured to live up to your expectations, and he’ll also feel anxious about letting you down. He’ll also wonder why you’ve
made up your mind about him so quickly.
“Instead, you must convey to a man that you are selective. Being selective means you let him know that while you like him and enjoy being with him, you are also a woman with options who is in control of what happens to her.
How do you do this? By continuing to have a life outside him; nurture your hobbies, spend time with friends and family,nimprove your life and career. When you do this, he starts feeling lucky to have a place in your life, and he’ll fight to stay there,” Carter notes.
Make his life better
Being in a relationship must come with benefits on both side and it makes it all the more appealing to a man when he knows that the relationship brings him a renewed sense of fulfillment.
Suggesting ways to build a lasting relationship with a man, Carter states that “the way to do this is by creating positive experiences with him. Men can’t be talked into relationships; they need to feel aNdeep, emotional connection before they commit to someone. In order for a man to see you as a necessary part of his life, you need to create thenright kind of experiences that will spark emotional attraction in him.
“A positive experience is anything that you both enjoy that is, above all, fun. Fight the need to talk about the relationship, and instead turn your attention to creating great moments together.
Do different things with him like playing sports along with the usual dinners and movies. Spend time in groups of friends. Read the paper together and do spontaneous things without planning.
Mix it up. All of these experiences show him that you are a woman who is easy-going and playful, and that’s the kind of woman he’ll realise he’d be a fool to let go of.”
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